A rough sketch from the book that we have created for our son
While we await the outcome of our complaint, we have created a book for our son that describes his story so far.
I’ve always wanted our son to understand his origins and to be honest with him from a young age. I’ve heard many stories of people only learning about their adoption as adults. They often describe what a huge shock they felt when they were informed. Although a person’s family are those that love and care for them, every child has the right to understand where they came from biologically. It’s a difficult one, though. How can I explain the actions of an absent father when I cannot understand them myself? And how do I protect my son from any feelings of rejection when I explain everything to him?
We decided that in order to tell his story in the best way possible, we had to leave our personal feelings about this adoption aside. We must separate our difficulties from our joy of his entrance into the world. After all, the outcome was the best I could have imagined. I am raising my beautiful boy with a man who loves him just as dearly.
We wanted to start explaining his history as soon as we thought he was old enough to understand and remember the facts. We are gradually arriving at that point in his development. He adores books and reads every night before he goes to bed. After he has read a story a couple of times with us he then instructs us to be quiet while he tells us the story. We decided to write him his very own book, which in very basic terms explains who made him, who loves him and what it means to be a family. I wrote the text while my husband created some basic sketches. At some stage in the future we hope to commission an artist to create some simple drawings for us.
This storybook is all the explanation and information he will need for a while. I am nervous for the day when his perfect face turns towards me and asks me “Why?”. But we will cross that bridge when we come to it. Until then I am happy that we are facing each stage with the love and openness that my son deserves.